


Stuck Together

by Ihere



Series: PoliceForcestuck [18]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Crime Fighting, F/M, Feelings, Gen, Stakeout, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-09
Updated: 2013-05-09
Packaged: 2017-12-04 17:53:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/713424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ihere/pseuds/Ihere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two officers are forced to talk about their FEELINGS.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

On a hill in sunny Skaian Park, two trolls walk up together holding a basket. They laugh as they grind up struggling to carry the basket in between them. One of the trolls, Karkat Vantas, takes a deep inhale of his lit cigarette and looks to his matesprit serenely. 

Nepeta Vantas smiles back at him and helps him lower the picnic basket at the top of the hill. She soon follows the basket and drops to the grassy ground with the wind tickling her skin. Karkat moves on top of her smiling and kisses around her face to finally touch her lips. Giggling, Nepeta forces Karkat away to reach into the picnic basket, but her matesprit just wraps his arms around her waist. 

However, when Nepeta opens the basket she screams so loudly that the sound appears to come at every angle to Karkat. The male troll looks over her shoulder to find Nepeta lifting a severed head out from the basket. The head is unidentifiable due to burns and bruises that were inflicted while it was alive. Karkat tries to tell her to release the head but she refuses to so he smacks it out of her hands and tries to comfort his wife. Nepeta is hysterically crying while masses of red blood cover her hands, but then Karkat looks down at his own hands to find them spewing out the same blood on Nepeta’s hands. 

He immediately withdraws away from her to rub them dry, but no matter how hard he tries, they are never clean. “Nepeta!” he shouts out, “You need to stop crying!”

“Why are you doing this to me?” she hollers back. “I’m innocent!”

Karkat tries to hold her, but every attempt he makes she revers back, “You’re innocent Nepeta! I-I just-“

“You can’t just leave me to die!” A new voice replaces Nepeta’s. Karkat looks up to find a beaten and tied up human crying to him. He recognizes it as the soon disembodied head.

Spades Slick coolly walks up behind the fallen troll, “Nothing to see here Officer Vantas. Just a disobedient employee.” 

Karkat stares at the doomed man, “Please!” the man shrieks. “Please you gotta save me! They’re going to kill me! Pl-Please, I have a family! I-I’m afraid to die,” he ends withdrawing to sobs. 

The mafia man lays a shoulder on the troll, “Time to leave.” 

Obediently, Karkat gets up and walks away from the still begging man to find himself surrounded in a dark room. He looks back to see if he could return, but nothing is there.

Suddenly a force hits him in the side, then the stomach, and then the face. Karkat collapses trying to hold every part of his body that is continuously beaten, but holding his own body doesn’t stop the pain. He manages to look up to a young woman crying; she is held up against a black wall and is unable to rescue him.

Karkat turns away from the woman to look down at the floor so she wouldn’t see him, “Please,” he whispers, “Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt Jade.”

The troll wakes up in his bed in a jolt. He looks around the room to find himself in his own apartment. Furious, Karkat grabs a nearby bottle that helped him to sleep and throws it at the wall. He then curses because Karkat realizes that he’ll have to clean that up, but in the meantime he looks at the time: three fifty-two am. 

Karkat collapses back in his bed wide awake and with no desire to try sleeping again. His hand tries to find the troll’s cell phone on the bed stand. In his hand, Karkat finds the contact number to reach his friend. 

“Hey motherfuckers,” the voice on the other line greets. “You reached motherfucking train station central. The party is on and the fucking is hot like a bitch between her tits. And there’s no getting off this party train because who the fuck knows how trains work.”

“Gamzee,” he sighs too tired to be angry, “cut your hoof-beast shit.”

“Ah shit bro, did my best motherfucker get a bad dream again?” Karkat responds with an affirmative noise. “Well why don’t you just tell your bro what happened this time.”

“I told you about the night when I found Slick killing that guy; basically that again.”

Gamzee’s voices cracks, “Fuck, that still eating at you? It was like years ago or something.”

“I know, but I practically killed that man. It’s my responsibility to protect every Skaia citizen, but I couldn’t stand up for myself to save that one and the countless others Slick’s murdered behind my back.”

“Bro you can’t let that get to you. You need to be a cool motherfucker and realize that that shit is just going to happen. Don’t forget that you kept that fucker from killing more.”

Karkat digs his nails into his head, “Cock-sucking lies. I could always do something, but I’m too much of a bitch biting bastard to stand up and stop him. I hated being his fucking lap dog!”

“Well you’re not anymore my number one bro-before-hoe. Anything else about that dream?”

“Yeah,” Karkat holds his covers close to him hoping to hide his shame. “Yeah Jade was there for once. It was that night when Slick broke our pact. Grub I wish she didn’t have to see that.”

“Hmm,” Gamzee ponders. 

“No. Don’t you fucking dare. I don’t need your shit-fucking interpretation on what ‘miracle’ my dream means. I don’t need that tonight.”

“Okay bro okay, just trying to help a fellow fucker out.”

“Well don’t, dreams are rectum-bursting idiocy that only assholes would try to decipher.” 

“You sure about that? Is there nothing from your dream that you might want?”

For a brief second Karkat’s mind turns to Jade, but he shakes that idea away because Karkat knows that there is no reason to ever think of Jade. Ever. “Actually Nepeta was there, but she wouldn’t want to get back together. Would she?” Gamzee is silent. “Gamzee? Gamzee what the fuck do you know?”

“I-I don’t know anything. I’m a mindless motherfucker over here.”

“Stop talking shit Gamzee, I know that you still talk to her. Does-Does she miss me?”

Gamzee deeply exhales into the phone, “Of course she misses you. She asks about you a lot because she cares like a bitch.”

Karkat recognizes the hesitation in Gamzee’s voice, “But?”

“But she doesn’t want to be with you like that again and bring back that feelings junk. She-She’s moved on.”

Karkat lays back in his bed staring at the ceiling, “Oh. Who is it?”

“Now bro you know she wouldn’t tell me that. I’m lucking that she was willing to spill that much. How are you feeling?”

“How am I feeling? Actually,” Karkat checks his heart rate finding it a little fast, but working, “I’m doing surprisingly better than I would have ever fucking imagined when hearing the old love of my life has moved on.”

“That’s great my little bro, I knew that you’d get better in no motherfucking time. And hey, maybe you’ll move on and find some sweet ass to fuck soon enough!”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “Night Gamzee.” He gets up from his bed to get ready for work all too well knowing that he wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep.

Hours pass seeming endless to the officer until his boss loudly wakes him up with a thud.

“Ah!” Karkat shouts waking up.

Chief of Police Zahhak frowns at him, “I do not tolerate sleeping in my department.” He places his hand on a file, “I have a report and assignment here. Go over it with Officer Harley when you can keep two eyes awake.” The blue blood then walks away from him to hand out folders to other officers. Karkat gets up from his chair and heads toward the break room where he knew his fellow officer would be.

Officer Harley and Vriska Serket are playing a round of ping pong together during their break; it appears as if Vriska is winning. The ball makes a tough dash to Jade’s left and rolls to Karkat’s feet. “Another point for me,” Vriska announces.

Jade studies the paddle as if there’s a defect, “Ugh I thought I was finally getting a hang of this game. I’m better using both hands instead of one.”

“Don’t worry Jade you’ll beat me eventually, I am the best teacher so it only fits that you would become the best student.” 

The woman then turns around to retrieve the ball, but is surprised to find her partner there. “Oh, hey there Karkat, how long have you been there?” 

The troll manages to glare through half-awake eyes, “Long enough to realize that you left me to sleep to play a fucking game of ping pong.”

“Come on, that’s not fair.” 

“Yes it is. I told you to keep me awake, not to abandon me so I could get scolded by the chief.”

Jade starts to pout, “It’s not our job to keep you awake.”

“Technically it would be Vriska’s-“ 

“It’s not my fault you slept; I tried to wake you up before we left.”

“-But you know what, it doesn’t matter, it’s time to do our real job and stop acting like three-sweeps-old playing fucking ping pong!”

The human finally notices the folder in his hand, “Assignment?”

“Yep, so put down the hand-fucking paddle and get back to your desk.”

A little annoyed, the two females put down their paddles and follow their friend back to their desks. Then they watch him as he reads the file silently to himself; a little annoyed because he could’ve done this before getting them. 

But after skimming the report, Officer Vantas hands the file over to Jade to look over. He sighs and rubs his face, “We got an idiotic assignment where we have to watch out for suspicious activity near a warehouse that we expect SJ to be making and exporting his own alcohol; fucking illegally of course. And we’ll be waiting outside in the car all night; Jade you’ll have to go home to get a change of clothes and whatever shit you’ll need tonight.”

Vriska tries to read some of the instructions over Jade’s shoulder, “Oh like a stake out.”

“No. It’s not like a fucking stake out. Don’t you dare use shitting cop show lingo with me. We are not a fucking cop show; we’re real cops.”

“Then what the fuck am I supposed to call this mission?”

“Nothing,” Karkat snarls, “You’re not going to call it anything because you aren’t coming; in fact, get out of here! This is classified work.”

The other troll turns to her woman ally, “Jaaaaaaaade,” she whines, “I want to go. Tell Karkat that he’s stupid.”

Jade frowns as she reads over the file, “Sorry Vriska, but I think you’ll have to sit this one out. It’s dangerous and needs to be kept on the down low so less people is better; besides, I need someone to watch Bec while I’m gone. So could you please just-?”

“Fine.” Vriska stands up, “I’m going to the bathroom.” 

“Wash your hands,” Karkat orders. He looks to Jade, “So do you think you can handle this? If we’re going to be stuck together all night then I want you to be capable of taking care of yourself.”

Jade reveals a smile that she’s been hiding for a while, “Wow Karkat, I’ve always wanted to go on one of these missions. They look like so much fun!”

He exhales already exhausted, “This is your first one right? Well it’s not fun it’s boring. The majority of these end up with nothing going on. And-“ he sees that Jade is far too excited to depress. 

“Sorry, I really am thrilled to finally go on a stake out mission!”

Karkat lowers his head frustrated, “Grub damn it you’re going to make this a long night aren’t you?”


	2. Chapter Two

Ten thirty-two pm.

Officer Harley walks down a street at one end of Skaia with two plastic bags in her hands. She carefully shuffles along through an alleyway onto the other side which holds a warehouse. The dark jacket that she wears clings close to her skin as if it too tries to be inconspicuous. 

The woman recedes in the dark waiting until she is positive that no one is outside to spot her, once certain she clings close to the wall as she moves along. When Jade reaches her destination, she stops next to a cheap, shadowed car and enters through the passenger side. Officer Vantas watches her enter from the inside of the vehicle, “You get everything okay?”

“Yup,” she hands one of the plastic bags to her partner, “Here’s yours.” 

Karkat looks inside the bag, “Did you remember soy sauce?”

“Yes,” Jade answers rolling her eyes because he reminded her to get that several times already.

“Good,” he pulls out one of the white boxes with a red symbol on the side. “This shit doesn’t taste good without it.”

“I know,” she pulls out her own container. “So what do we say?”

The troll glares up at her annoyed, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She opens her box and smells the noodles pleasantly, “I still don’t understand why you wanted to eat at ten thirty.”

“Do you do anything without asking a billion fucking questions?”

“I don’t like to be ignorant or blindly follow others.”

Karkat swallows the noodles that are dangling outside his mouth, “Ugh. Waziki’s Eastern Cuisine is only open until eleven. I’m not waiting to get hungry at midnight to try to find some place then. Besides, any food place open at midnight is probably filled with rectum fucking, barely digestible food.”

“Yummy,” Jade responds sarcastically. “Still I don’t know if leaving was worth it. What if I got caught?”

“Did you?”

“Well no but-“

“Then it doesn’t matter. We’ll need all the energy we can for tonight just to stay up, and I don’t need to be distracted by my grumbling stomach telling me ‘Hey asshole, your real asshole wants something to shit out. Why not get some fucking food to eat before I punch you in your grubdamn organs!’” Karkat takes a swig from his nearby water bottle, “Besides, you weren’t complaining earlier. You’re were just as fucking hungry as I was going to be.” The other officer frowns but sticks to her food. 

After twenty minutes of watching the warehouse and eating, Karkat puts his trash back into the plastic bag and stares out the windshield. “Okay Jade, I’m going to watch for an hour, and then I’m going to wake you up to take the next shift. And as I can only hope, you’ll figure out that the cycle will continue until morning.”

“Only one hour shifts? Shouldn’t they be longer?”

“No, we need to each get our sleep and not be staying up too long.”

Jade disagrees, “But wouldn’t it be better if we each stay up half the entire night? So we could get actual rest?”

“Nope.”

“But why then?” she questions now frustrated. 

“Because I said so.”

“I cannot believe you’re giving me that answer! Oh wait, yes I can, but it’s stupid.”

Karkat continues to stare at the warehouse, “Then I’m calling the superiority card on you.”

“What! That’s not fair, we’re both equal officers.”

“I don’t think so; I have more years than you do. . . Also the chief labeled me as the superior on this mission, my decision is final.”

Jade catches his reluctance, “You made that up!”

“No I didn’t.”

“Yes you did. And if you didn’t, then show me where it says so.”

“I can’t, it was on the file report.”

“Then give me the file.”

“Can’t, I left it at the office.”

“Ah! You are so frustrating like . . all the time! What if we need it?”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “I have it memorized.”

“No you don’t! You can’t even memorize the microwavable popcorn instructions!”

“Stop arguing Harley before anyone hears your screeching. Now go to sleep and I’ll either wake you up if something interesting is going on, or more likely, when my shift is over.”

Finally defeated, Jade lays back in her seat, “What are we defining as ‘interesting.’” 

“Whatever fucking incriminating evidence we can find that suggests SJ and his group are acting against the law here. Remember, we are not here to interfere, but to observe.”

“I remember.” Jade starts to close her eyes.

“Good. I’ll wake you in-“ 

Officer Harley is already asleep.

Twelve forty-eight pm.

“Kaaaaaaaarkat wake up,” Jade whines while prodding the troll’s shoulder. He keeps his eyes closed, perhaps she’ll leave him alone if he stays quiet the male officer reasons. Jade moves to shaking his shoulder, “Kaaaa-“

Karkat gets up, “What the fuck do you want!” He looks outside and finds nothing happening.

“I uhh-“

“There isn’t even anything going on!” 

“Okay I know but-“

“What is wrong with you!” Karkat yells loudly enough so it can just be heard outside the car.

The woman twiddles her fingers nervously, “I’m bored.”

“You’re bored.” The troll brings both his hands across his mouth to muffle the aggravation. When he is done, Karkat looks over to her, “What do you mean you’re bored?”

Jade, slightly terrified now, explains, “There’s nothing to do here and I’m usually asleep by now or doing something where I can actively keep my eyes open. But now I’m starting to fall asleep!” 

“You can be such a grub,” Karkat complains beginning to rub the crud out of his eyes. “Didn’t you bring a book or something?”

“Umm”

“I told you to bring some shit that could keep you fucking awake! That’s what you were supposed to do when you went home!”

“You didn’t tell me anything! I just got night clothes and came back to the office!”

“You should’ve figured it out on your own.”

“Well how could I? This is my first time doing this! Besides, isn’t a book a distraction from watching?”

Karkat sighs at her stupidity, “No, you can do both at the same time, and it doesn’t help not reading a fucking book if you fall asleep!”

“Oh,” Jade looks around the car, “Where’s your book, Karkat?”

He lies back down in his reclined seat, “What?”

“Didn’t you bring a book? Well why don’t I read that?” The troll thinks to himself for a bit. “Come on, you said read a book, so I’ll read a book.”

“Fine you helpless human grub.” Karkat reaches down the side of his seat and pulls out a paperback book, “Here.”

Jade studies the cover confused, “Um what is this?” The cover depicts two trolls in an overly extravagant embrace while a volcano erupts behind him. Boners are apparent on both of the trolls.

Quickly angered, Karkat replies roughly, “It’s a book for only the most highly intelligent in the performance and digestion of troll romance. I’m sure the bare minimum of your romantic IQ could barely comprehend the first page. So just give it back-“ he tries to reach for it.

Jade keeps it held back, “This looks like one of those porno books. Like where they build up all this tension between two people before they just do it.” She looks up at Karkat, “You’re reading this?”

“N-No!” Karkat makes another grab, but Jade keeps him away. “See, you’re obviously too naïve to understand such romance. Just hand it back-“

“Calm down Karkat, I won’t tell anyone you’re reading this if you’re so insecure.”

“I’m not-“

“But hey I’ll read this.”

“Oh.” Karkat looks back at the book unsettled, “Well fine. This time don’t wake me up unless-“

Jade looks down on the clock, “Hey look my shift is over!” She hands the book back to Karkat. “See you in an hour!”

One thirty-three.

“Karkat?” Jade whispers while putting the book down between their seats. “Are you awake?”

He slowly opens his eyes, “Funny thing about that question Jade, no matter what I’m going to end up awake.”

“Sorry.”

“No no, don’t mind me. Please, I’m sure your question is more important than me getting sleep. So tell me Jade, what do you need?”

Jade holds up the book, “I finished it.”

“What? How did you finish-It took me three days to read through that my first time!”

“Well I’m a speed reader.”

“Great you’re one of those chumps. Fucking people that read too fast and don’t dwell in the true meaning of the words. Then they try to convince you that the book sucks when they don’t have the slightest idea what they’re talking about.”

Jade looks back at the book in her hands, “I guess? I did skip the sex scenes.”

“Ugh, see Jade, this is why you’re so immature. You skip everything important and that’s fucking with your growth.”

“Jerk. I’ve had sex before and romance for your information. Anyway I skipped those parts because I found them unrealistic and cheesy.”

“Like you know what troll sex is like.”

“I do too!”

The two officers stare at each other. Karkat leans away uneasy, “So you-?”

“No no no no no no no no!” Jade exclaims. “It’s not that, Vriska has told me because I was . . . interested.” 

Karkat slumps back, “Grub. I swear you two have gotten way too close.”

The woman crosses her arms, “Well I don’t know what you expect!

“A more impersonal relationship between two friends. You two act like . . .”

“Moirails?”

The troll is stumped, “I wasn’t going to say that, but I guess-“

“Karkat, Vriska and I are moirails now. You would know that if you paid more attention.”

“Yeah because I’m the one that should pay more attention. . . Moiraillagence,” Karkat sighs. “So that’s what she was going for.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. But do you think you two are good for each other?”

Jade runs her hand through her hair, “I’ll admit that I was worried at first, but then we got to talk. Actually talk about our past, and our feelings. It was something I never experienced before, and I liked it and wouldn’t want to give it up for the world.”

“So you learned about her past?”

“Yeah . . . It’s pretty complicated. We had a good ‘feelings jam’ for that.”

Karkat starts to shift over trying to look natural, “So what did you hear?”

“I’m not going to tell you! Confidentiality and stuff!”

“Alright I understand. I’m a moirail too, but I’m curious.” 

“Just don’t ask me again, okay?”

“I already told you I understood. Let it go already.”

“Right.” Jade watches as Karkat tries to fall asleep again, “I still don’t have anything to do.”

He keeps his eyes closed, “Then find something to do.”

The female officer looks back at the warehouse which is still empty as far as they can tell. “Do you want to talk?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out the PoliceForcestuck tumblr page for additional content.


	3. Chapter Three

Officer Vantas keeps his eyes closed, “Talk? You do realize that I’d have to be fucking awake for that?”

“Please?” She begs. “I don’t want to sleep. I’ll even keep you up during your shift if you want.”

Karkat sighs sensing the pattern that’s forming, “Fine. I’m up. I wasn’t expecting to sleep anyway.” The troll sits up and stares droopily at his partner, “What do you want to talk about?”

“Well, all the movies have the girls talk about boys or hair.”

“I’m not talking about stupid clichés. Haven’t you ever had a real sleepover instead of that pretend bullshit? I’ve seen enough sleepovers from my ‘sisters’ at the Home.”

Jade looks embarrassingly over to the side, “I think the closest I’ve ever had to a sleep over is rooming with Vriska. But she doesn’t want to do the stuff from the movies.”

“Didn’t you do any of that shit during training?”

“No, everyone was too tired. Not to mention they had this dumb idea that they were above it. Besides, the academy was . . . complicated.”

Karkat waves his hands in between them. “No. No no no no. That will lead us to bullshit drama that I do not need. No. This is anti-personal angst night. No.” He finally lets his hands down, “Find something else to talk about.”

The woman is surprised by his reaction, ‘Uh okay? Well did you see the um news?”

“Did I see the news?” he repeats frowning. “Yes Jade. I have seen the news. What a totally not vague question! Three fucking cheers for that genius idea.”

“You don’t have to be so rude!”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “Then don’t be so stupid. This was your fucking idea. Stick to it before I get cranky.”

Jade frowns to herself, “Okay. What do you think about the whole situation with Crocker Corporation?”

“I agree with most people,” Karkat begins while relaxing, “I think it’s great that someone is finally coming around to clean up this town. Having a Crocker Factory in Skaia is what we need. I’ve been practically mailing the bitch to come over here for years.”

“She certainly has made herself seen . . .”

The troll looks at Jade curiously, “You don’t agree?”

“I’m not sure. Building a whole new factory is so out of the blue. Betty Crocker hasn’t visited this town in . . . forever.”

“Not much different from you. What it’s almost a year since you’ve arrived?”

“Yeah, but Vriska told me that Crocker would completely avoid Skaia. She’s visited every other major city, but Skaia.”

“So? Now she’s visiting. What’s the big deal?”

Jade rubs her shoulder as if chilled, “It’s probably nothing but . . . Feferi met with Crocker to negotiate land and licenses, and she told me that something’s . . off with that woman.”

He scoffs, “Feferi is probably overworked. Or a bit threatened; with the publicity that Crocker is bringing, she could probably become the next mayor. I might even vote for her.”

“She is looking into living here and becoming a citizen . . . That doesn’t bother you?”

“Nope. She’s proven better than the majority of people here. You’re probably not much different from her.”

“But I’m working to keep Skaia safe!” Jade professes.

“And Crocker probably will too. I think only you and Feferi are suspicious of the good-natured woman.”

“Karkat, I’ve never seen you so defensive for someone else before.”

He blinks a little dazed, “Yeah . . . That’s weird. But I guess I’ll stick to what I believe in?”

“Hmm, well Vriska agrees with me.”

“Yeah that makes you look fucking sane. Why don’t you just have Vriska mind control her to find out.”

“No, she can’t control humans-Oh you’re not being serious. I probably shouldn’t have said that.”

Karkat groans to himself and leans back, “Don’t tell Vriska or she’ll kill me.”

“I think I’ll actually have to tell Vriska, but I won’t let her hurt you. You two are my closest friends.”

“Wow what a prize. What’s the return rate? Can I exchange you for something better? Or at least get my sanity back?”

“Haha very funny. For your information, I take my friends very seriously.” Jade gets quiet for a second, “I want to keep everyone around.”

“With this job you could get lost. Besides every time I see you you’re with friends having the fucking time of your life.”

“You think I have a lot of friends?”

“Can I not? Seriously can I not? Most of your friends annoy me. Except Kanaya, she’s okay, but I think her hanging out with that Rose woman is messing with her head.”

Jade looks out at the stars, “I never would have thought of myself as popular.”

“Oh Grub,” he rubs his face with his hand, “Are you that self-centered?”

“No it’s not that. I just didn’t grow up with a lot of friends. Even at the academy. Especially at the academy.”

Karkat rests on the armrest, “But what about that guy you were talking about before . . . to Vriska, and that girl?”

She blinks astonished, “I’m surprised you heard that.”

“I listen to you sometimes,” he shrugs not really caring. 

“Well yeah I did make a few friends there and I still manage to keep contact with them. I’m thinking about planning a trip so that they can meet Vriska.”

“So what are they like?” he questions a bit sleepily. 

“Okay well,” Jade brushes a strand of hair behind her ear, “one of my friends, Jane, is pretty nice. She has this weird bakery and joke shop at the Capital where she works with her dad. I met her through one of my fellow cadets Jake. He’s a good guy, but I think he only joined the force for action.”

“He must be disappointed.”

“No actually. He still finds a thrill from helping people in little ways; even if that’s by handing out speeding tickets. Jake’s kind of goofy.”

“No wonder you’re friends.”

The woman smiles at her partner, “I’ll take that as a compliment Mr. Grumpy.”

“So they are your only friends at the Capital?”

“I guess,” she answers while biting her lip. “I had people who were friends with Jake and Jane, but I didn’t connect with them as well. Those two were really weird.”

“Well then I don’t see how you wouldn’t fucking connect with them on the spot.”

Officer Harley rolls her eyes, “Ha ha. Very funny. Will you be serious with me for a second? They’re a bit uncomfortable for me to be around. Like they’re nice people but . . .”

“But?”

“They are really into conspiracies.”

“So their think pan is too full of bullshit like yours,” Karkat responds getting more and more into the conversation.

“No. They think the whole government is out to get them. I just think Crocker is strange.”

“Totally different.” Jade sighs and looks out at the warehouse to find nothing going on. Officer Vantas stares at her realizing he’s gone too far, “Listen Jade I-“ she turns to him, and Karkat can’t finish his sentence. 

After a few seconds of awkward silence Jade steps up, “I’m not going to cry if that’s what you think. I can handle myself.” Karkat just wants this night to be over with.

“I didn’t think that. . . So you never did explain why you didn’t connect with many people back then.”

“I don’t know if you’d relate if I said I was an outsider.” He gives her an annoyed look. “Oh right, sorry. But you know with your blood, you can at least hide it.”

“Jade hiding it is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. And I do it every fucking day.”

The woman cuddles up to herself, “I didn’t realize the strain it puts on you.”

“Well I doubt I would be all sunshine and fucking rainbows if I maroon blooded. But I still don’t see how you’re an outsider. You’re a normal human.”

“But I’m not!” Jade brings her legs up to curl into a ball. “I’m a freak.”

Karkat looks at her with no concern on his face, “Seriously Jade? You’re a freak? I know that I can be harsh on you, but get over yourself. No one is calling you a freak.”

“Not here, and even then I’m not sure.”

“Jade I-“

“People seem to like me; though I don’t know if I’ll ever be normal.”

Her partner is starting to be annoyed, “Okay enough of your pity party. First off, you’re not a freak. Second, being normal is overrated. It’s the people that aren’t normal that get shit done. Third, you can’t keep talking to me like this if you aren’t going to tell me why. So stop whining and learn to talk. You might not be crying, but you’re still just as annoying.”

She looks at him impressed, “I see why you make such a good moirail.”

“You bet on your fucking life I am. I don’t even know how Vriska could deal with you.”

“I was a lot worse when I talked her,” Jade says with a small smile on her face. “Hmm I told you before that my parents died shortly after I was born so my grandpa raised me.”

“I remember.”

“Well that turned sour quickly. My grandpa was paranoid. I was his only family left and he didn’t want to lose me, so I became his trapped little pet. He never let me leave the island where we lived or let me meet anyone new. I was lucky to have Bec with me as my friend. But it didn’t stop there; he then started researching the ability to live forever.” Jade bites her lip to calm down, “He made my dog and I his science experiments! He was so scared when he thought I might get asthma he gave me biotic lungs. Do you know how fucked up that is? Flower did you know your father had asthma? Why don’t we fix that for you? He never even asked me! Then he wanted to make the two of us immortal, so he experimented on Bec,” her voice cracks. “I told him to back off. To stop. He tried to convince me otherwise, but I wouldn’t let him after I saw the pain on Bec’s face. Surprise to me that Bec is still alive and well because of that test. But it doesn’t matter anyway because I could never let my guard down around my grandpa again. I do care about him, but I was also scared of him.”

Karkat hesitantly places a hand on her shoulder, “Jade I had no idea. You never acted like . . . this.” 

“I know,” she leans into his hand comfortably, “I try to not let it bother me, but it does. And when I turned eighteen I demanded to leave.”

“How old where you before-?”

“I was six or seven I think. There weren’t many way to keep track of time back then. But when I was eighteen he tried to stop me so I constructed a flying machine.”

“Wait, at eighteen you made an airplane?”

“Not really, just something solar power contraption that could take me from an isolated island in the Pacific Ocean to the Capital.”

The troll stares at her bewildered, “That’s impressive.”

“I was worried you’d call me a freak.”

“As tempting as that is. But how did you even do that?”

“Mad scientist as a guardian leads to genius inventor of a daughter,” she answers nonchalantly. “My grandpa wanted me to take his place after he died. It was pretty useful information I must admit.”

“So why didn’t you go to a real college and shit on those so called professors? Preferably in the brain area.”

“I didn’t want to become my grandpa. Besides, I wanted to help people and yet remain insignificant. What can I say? I wanted some normality. No matter how overrated it is.” 

“Becoming a police officer will certainly make you feel insignificant.”

Jade snickers at the truth. “Yes, but when I went to the academy that’s when I realized how much my grandpa had ruined me. I spent a few months using the money I had taken with me to survive, but to also learn social interactions. That wasn’t easy since I had the social skill of a dog. Literally.”

“So did you,” Karkat leans back to the car door a little, “You didn’t sniff anyone’s butt did you?”

“I can tell you that people don’t enjoy that as much as dogs,” she answers sarcastically. 

“Good to know.”

“And I barely got accepted into the academy. I based off all of my answers on the psychological test from the books and movies my grandpa caught. Apparently after you save the hostage you don’t kiss them in front of an explosion. But I was accepted since I didn’t seem homicidal.”

Her partner holds up his hand imaging a beverage in it, “A drink to a fucking wonderful system.” Jade pretends to clink a glass back making Karkat return a rare, but short, smile.

“However the results of my physical exam became rumors around the academy, and they were only proven during physical training. Because of my grandpa’s experiments, I could run, climb or fight without a break. While everyone else would end exhausted I would be up for more. I learned to lie later on and fake heavy breathing, but to my fellow cadets I was an anomaly. Mix that with my mental disposition and I was lucky to make any friends, and even they thought I was immature. I unfortunately made a lot of bad mistakes trying to get people to like me later.” Jade rubs her head out of exhaustion or anger. “You know what everyone said about Skaia up there? They called it a place of misfits. The city where only losers go. Apparently the academy only deports the officers who aren’t good enough for the Capital.”

“I know Jade, I was born there,” Karkat grumbles. “They’re a bunch of fucking brick heads with excretes coming out of their ears. Not even their own but their fucking society. You know if society had a physical form that could poop.”

“Nice visual Karkat.”

“My pleasure.”

“In any case the board decided that despite my excellent marks, I wasn’t capable of being a full-fledged officer. Instead they sent me to Skaia to have them sort me out.” Jade covers her eyes, “I was humiliated. And my grandpa was right that I wasn’t good enough on my own.”

Karkat pulls her hands down, “You know what Jade, fuck’em. They’re idiots to not see your full potential. I’ll even say that they’re as stupid as me to not see how special you are.” 

“Thanks . . . but no need to get all gushy.” 

“Fucking hilarious Jade.”

“No seriously you’ll make my heart explode from the love,” she jokes amused.

The male officer looks out the window, “Still no activity, what a surprise.” He turns back to her, “So what about your grandpa? He died and you get your crap back?”

Jade bites the inside of her cheeks nervously, “Not exactly. After I graduated I went back to see him. He was angry but willing to resolve some issues. I was just happy to see Bec again, but when grandpa forbid me from becoming returning . . I was mad. I didn’t want to stay there again. Now I want to remind you that he was very old and a little out of it and-“

He looks at her baffled, “Jade, did you kill your guardian?”

“It was an accident! He wanted to clear the air with some hunting on the island like we used to. I walked off on my own and I saw something and I wasn’t thinking clearly and I-I-I-“

“Fuckingshitasscocksucker!”

“I know! I tried to save him but there wasn’t anything I could’ve done. I called the authorities and they wrote it off as a minor hunting accident when they visited.”

“They didn’t arrest you?”

She looks down, “I might have lied just a bit. He was so old they believed me that-“ 

“Jade! You fucking killed a guy!”

“Karkat I-I understand if you want to report me. I deserve some jail time,” Jade admits in a doleful tone.

He groans annoyed by the situation, “I’m not going to do that. Besides, there are millions of free people who deserve imprisonment more than you. I believe you that you didn’t intend to do it.”

They stare at each other in silence, “Again thank you Karkat. I appreciate you listening to me.”

“Yeah I guess it wasn’t as horrible as I imagined. But how did Vriska react when you told her about the ‘accident?’”

“Oh she said The bastard fucking deserved that bullet, and she would’ve shot him herself if he was still alive.”

Karkat just looks up as if that’s a perfectly acceptable response, “Of course she would.”


	4. Chapter Four

Karkat looks at the car’s clock, “It’s time to switch.”

“Do you want me to stay up with you?” Jade queries. “It’s only fair.”

“No I don’t need you to do that,” he claims. “I have enough distractions to keep me awake.” He holds up his large coffee as he finishes it off.

“Oh,” she looks off to the side. “Are you sure-sure?”

The troll grunts, “Yes I’m fucking sure-sure like the Grub damn one-sweep-old I am.”

Jade starts to pout, “You know what your problem is Karkat? You-“

“No. Fuck no I’m too tired for this if I want to keep my sanity. Why are trying to fight me?”

“Why do you want to stop talking?”

“Because then we’ll move on to me and I don’t want to talk about dumb shit that was in the past. What the fuck is even with you humans? All you want to do is sort out your problems, but you know what? Just let them go! Forget them and they’ll leave you!”

She looks at him unsettled, “Karkat I-“

“No Jade. I’m done. I’m don’t want to share my ‘feelings’ like you do. Go to sleep and leave me alone.” His partner frowns to herself but turns away.

Karkat tries not to think about how much he messed up. He tries not to think about it for five minutes. He tries not to think about if for twenty minutes. He tries not to think about it for fifty-five minutes, but he cannot. 

He looks over at his ‘friend’ who appears to be sleeping peacefully. Karkat opens his mouth just a little to say, “Jade . . .” She moves around cuddling herself.

“I didn’t sleep.” 

“Are you tired?”

“No,” she whispers with half-closed eyes. Jade opens them up and looks apologetically at Karkat, “I’m sorry. I should have let you have your privacy.”

The troll sighs, “I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t have barked at you. It was dumb.”

“I just worry you know? I thought I knew everything about my friends, but then I really get to know Vriska and it’s like . . . I knew nothing at all.” She looks over to the troll, “I don’t want to have that happen with you.”

“I don’t have dark secrets Jade,” Karkat explains. “I’ve told you practically everything.”

Jade holds herself tighter, “But I’m not looking for ‘dark secrets.’ I want to make sure that you and Vriska are okay. I don’t want either of you to be unhappy.”

“Why would you think I’m unhappy?” She responds with an awkward look. “Jade, just because I’m angry most of my fucking life doesn’t mean I’m unhappy. I’m managing fine.”

“Karkat,” Jade reaches out to comfort him but back out, “you deserve better than managing. Sometimes I wonder if you are ever really happy, or if you fake it. Have you ever been happy?”

“Yes,” he answers. Karkat is tempted to tell her to back off. To demand that Jade drops the conversation, but he wants to continue. He’ll blame it on the sleep deprivation in the morning, but he’ll be lying to himself. “I was young. Maybe a sweep or two old. I was living at a care house alone and scared. Everything was confusing and no one cared to explain or at least talk to me about it. But then someone picked me up in their arms and comforted me. I stopped crying like the little troll I was and felt safe.” He stops.

Jade tilts her head interested, “Who picked you up?”

“Her name was Tivrosa. She was a caretaker at the house and the closest thing I had to a ‘mother.’ She personally took it upon herself to care for me since no other staff member wanted to. She protected me, taught me how to smoke to hide my blood color, and was my friend. She cared for me more than any of my ‘siblings,’ but I didn’t notice until I was older. When I was eight sweeps old she told me everything.” Karkat stops talking.

“Everything?” Jade asks.

“Tivrosa had jade blood, meaning like every other jade blood she worked for the Mother Grub carrying for grubs.”

Officer Harley shakes her head, “Every troll with jade blood doesn’t work for the Mother Grub. Look at Kanaya! She certainly isn’t caring for young trolls.”

“You’re right. Not all jade trolls do that, only the ones competent enough for the work can.”

“. . . What?”

“Jade, has it never crossed your mind why Kanaya is working here? She couldn’t handle Mother Grub’s work, so she came here as a loser. That’s what you said Skaia was for, right?”

The woman bows her head, “I had no idea. Kanaya never told me.”

“I wouldn’t blame her. It’s a huge dishonor for that to happen to a jade blooded troll. Make sure not to bring it up to Kanaya.”

“Don’t worry about that, but what were you saying about Tiwasa?”

“Tivrosa. She was casted out of the caverns for her botch.” 

“Botch? What was that?”

Karkat takes a breath uneasily, “Me. My ‘mother’ was actually the troll that took care of my egg, but when I came out as this . . . Well I don’t blame her for trying to kill me.”

Jade is wide-eyed, “She tried to kill you?”

“She told me that as soon as she saw my blood color she took me outside and grabbed a sharp rock. I was laid down with the rock ready to be thrust down, but she couldn’t do it. She realized more and more with each passing second that she couldn’t kill me. Unfortunately for her, other trolls found her and condemned her for not finishing me. And when she refused to let them kill me, we were banished from the caverns.”

“You were told all of this?”

He sighs, “Yeah. Tivrosa then found a small home to raise me in and when I grew old enough I left her to find my lusus like the others trolls my age. And I wasn’t supposed to ever see her again. But when I started living with my lusus in an abandoned building, others found me who wanted to take my new home away from me. And the few that didn’t want to fight me change their minds once they saw Crabdad’s spilt blood.”

“Crabdad?”

“Don’t laugh.”

“I’m not I find it sweet,” she explains in a comforting voice.

Karkat grumbles, “Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like to have him, but then I realize that I’ll never know so why bother. And after Crabdad died I was found by humans who sent me to a care house. Where surprise surprise, Tivrosa was there and I didn’t even remember her. What an unforgivable piece of shit I was to do that.”

“And so she told you all of this years later.”

“And she thought she was to blame for my blood. She wondered constantly if she bumped my egg, or if she kept me too cold. That’s the problem with our society; they can worry someone to death with their criticisms. If they’d just accept what done is fucking done then we can move past everything no one wants to deal with.”

“I’m confused Karkat, I thought you said you are a full troll.”

“I am,” he growls. “Look at me Jade! Do you see any human features on me?”

“Well no-“

“Rhetorical question! I was raised a troll and I’ll die a troll like my mother promised.”

Jade, not wanting to get on Karkat’s defensive side, tries to change the conversation, “So if you were raised like that then how did you get your symbol? I’ve never seen other trolls with it before.” Karkat looks down on his belt where his symbol is shown.

“She gave me this too. I don’t really understand it though, but she says it stands for equality or something stupid. It doesn’t matter because I don’t care what fucking trolls could have shared this symbol with me.”

“Really? I thought all trolls loved that! At least Vriska seemed to . . .”

“Yes Jade, all trolls are represented by Vriska.”

“Ugh you know what I mean!”

“Well to answer your dumb question, only high bloods really care about that ancestor junk. It doesn’t make much sense to me since all the ancestors from Alternia are dead or we could never learn about them. Not to mention how the generations on the travel to Earth did nothing interesting. And I don’t give a single fuck about the assholes that fought in the First War.”

“So what happened to your mom?”

“Like all trolls she got old and died. But it was shortly after she told me about me so I was pissed and thought going through a depressed ‘goth’ stage was the way to go. I was such an idiot back then. For all I fucking know I still am. Whoops! Hold the presses everyone, I’m an idiot! Whoop-dee-fucking-doo! Now everyone go home because print is dead. I’m going to right an addition to the story called ‘The Fuck Up Called Karkat.’ It’ll be so popular on my blog!” Karkat bends over pressing his fingers onto his face trying to stop the emotions, “Why her?! She was everything and I just had to fuck it up before she died! I should have noticed how weak she’d gotten.”

Jade frowns sadly to herself from wanting to comfort him but not wanting to set him off, “I’m sorry that she died Karkat.”

He shakes his head, “It is what it is. We argued a lot before because I didn’t want to believe her, and I didn’t get to say I’m sorry or thank you.”

“She sounds like the type of person who would understand and love you no matter what.”

“You’re right. She was so wonderful and supportive when I was training to become an officer.”

“So why did you decide to become a police officer anyways?”

“Because,” he shrugs, “I didn’t want other trolls to become like me. I figured someone had to stick up for the pathetic trolls that can’t even handle themselves.” Karkat looks over at the clock, “I’d say we wasted enough time here. Ready to go?”

Jade nods, “Yeah. I’m disappointed nothing happened at the warehouse.”

“I warned you so.”

“I know, but thanks for talking to me. Here, let’s switch sides.” Without argument Karkat gets out of the car and moves to the other side. “Thanks! I know you wanted to drive us here, but I think Vriska would prefer if I drove her car home.”

“I won’t argue, her car drives badly.”

Neither one really talked on the way home or fell asleep. While Jade concentrates on driving home, Karkat can only think of one thing, “Jade’s pretty cool I guess when she’s not annoying or anything. She’s not as pampered as I thought too. And she didn’t laugh at me when I told her about my life like I expected. And she’s smart, I don’t think she fakes it like some other assholes that I’ve dealt with. I guess Jade’s really . . . special.”

When they finally arrive at Karkat’s apartment, Jade drops her partner off and says, “Night!” Karkat stays outside to watch her drive off to her own apartment. 

The troll then walks up the stairs into his apartment, opens the door and prepares for bed by stripping down to the underwear. Karkat collapses into his bed and pulls the covers over hoping to get some sleep before work that’ll come in the afternoon. 

He is one second away from sleeping before his eyes wake up more alert than ever in the entire night. The troll tries to shake the thought away but he cannot.

The officer sits up in his bed and grasps his head astonished, “I’m red for Jade!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s my birthday so I’m finally giving everyone JadeKat.


	5. Chapter Five

Karkat rolls over in his bed to check his clock; it reads ten thirty-three. Despite how wide awake the officer was last night he managed to fall asleep. He knows that he has till noon before he has to report for work, so what will he decide to do until then?

Getting out of bed, Karkat dresses and cleans himself so that he’s ready for work. The time afterwards reads eleven o five; still too much time before work. Karkat sighs realizing that he’ll have to confront his feelings for Jade rather than ignore them. He picks up his cell phone and searches the contacts before finding a phone number.

It rings four times before picking up, “Yuello?”

“Gamzee it’s me.”

“Haha I knew it was you bro. Motherfucking caller id helps the bro out you know?”

“That’s great Gamzee. Now I need you to-“

“Hahaha.”

“What are you laughing about?” Karkat questions annoyed.

“I tried to say hello when I answered, but I said yellow. Haha they sound so similar. Like how do words work? The English language is so fucked up man; they’re like it’s i before e except after c. But that’s a lot of piss you know? Like science which is dumb too unless bubbles are made. That’s why I don’t give three and a half fucks about grammar, right my motherfucker?” Someone on the other side agrees with the troll and the sound of two hands smacking against each other in agreement that most bros cannot fathom for the theory of awesomeness is not bestowed upon everyone. None of that makes any sense but what can Karkat expect when talking to Gamzee.

“Okay Gamzee fuck all of that. I need to talk to you so come over here now.”

“Can’t brother-in-my-mother-fucker. I’m at work.”

“What? Why are you at work?”

“Uh to work like you told me to? Did you not want me to work cause I don’t have to. I’ll leave right now-“

“No don’t do that. I just didn’t expect you to actually work for once. Actually this might work out better over the phone because I need your help.”

“With what?”

“I’m going to tell Jade I’m red for her and I need you to make sure I don’t wimp out.”

“Wow bro, when did your feelings get all red for the chicka?”

“I’m not exactly sure. I just realized it last night, but who knows when it started. Like how did a girl that I saw as an annoying child transform into this beautifully amazing woman that I both respect and am allured to? How did I let that happen though? I wanted to move on, but I never imagined it would be a human; never thought it could ever be a young one.”

“I guess that’s why you’re getting over Kitty-Sis.”

“Yeah, but now I want Jade to feel red for me. That’s even more unlikely then Nepeta.”

“Ah bro don’t talk like that.”

“I know which is why I have to find out if Jade feels the same way about me. I can’t stand not knowing and even if I’m turned down then at least I know. I need you to keep me to it so I don’t make another huge mistake.”

“I’m gamzy bro. Hehe see what I did bro?”

“That’s great, now I need you to stick with me on the phone encouraging me. Think you can do that?”

“Yeah, like customers don’t need me to talk to them, right?”

“Ah cock-sucker! Okay then I’ll just call you whenever I have doubts okay?”

“Whatever you want bro.”

“Then I’ll call you later.”

Karkat sticks his phone into his pocket and heads out of his apartment to the street. He takes out a cigarette to hopefully calm his nerves as he quickly reaches Jade’s apartment. 

Knowing her apartment number, Karkat buzzes on the intercom to contact her. “What?” a bothered voice answers.

“Who is this?”

“It’s Vriska, asshole. I can see you standing their like an awkward teenager.”

“Wow Vriska, did you change your last name to fit your personality?”

“Oh fuck you!”

Karkat presses hard on the button, “Wait don’t leave, I’m sorry!”

“Oh looooooook whose apologizing. Whatever you want must be important.”

“I need to talk to Jade.”

“Why?”

“I’m not telling you! And shouldn’t you be at work?”

“My superiors aren’t there so who gives a fuck?”

“Okay fine just tell me where Jade is.”

“Sorry, but your princess is in another castle.”

Karkat almost backs up confused, “. . . What? Jade is totally not my princess!”

“No duh. Don’t you get the reference? No? Well I’ll admit that I only got it because Jade wanted to play some video games. Pretty fun ones too.”

“Is this your slow way of telling me Jade’s not here?”

“Yeah I’m the slow one, genius.”

“Fine I’m the fucking idiot!” Karkat can’t believe the lengths that he’s going to. “Where is she?”

“Not here.”

“No kidding!” he says raising his voice to an irritated tone.

“Listen, I’m going to save time here, for myself and not for you, and tell you that Jade is out but she’ll be back for work.”

Karkat starts to smash his cigarette, “Why can’t you just tell me where she is!?”

“Why do you need to talk to her?”

“I-I can’t tell you.”

“Yeeeeeeeeah here’s the thing, if you can’t tell the moirail why you want to see her then I don’t trust you with her whereabouts,” she explains. “So bye, I have some coins to collect.”

There is a low beep and Vriska is gone. Karkat stands at the doorway with no entrance and no idea where to go next. He backs up and starts heading home reaching into his pockets. He dials searches his contacts for his moirail, “Gamzee.”

“Hey bro, uh oh did you back out? Cause I’m assuming you’d be fucking chicka now if you didn’t.”

“No she wasn’t home.” He presses his fingertips into his head frustrated, “Ugh what am I going to do!”

“Can’t you just find her?”

“Yes Gamzee, I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard to search the whole city for one-“ Karkat looks inside a small restaurant and finds Jade sitting alone waiting with food in front of her. “I found her,” he says in disbelief.

“See bro, motherfucking miracles will help bitches out.”

“I didn’t expect it to happen so soon. What if I’m not ready?”

“Come on bro you grab that ass and-“

“Don’t finish that. So what do I do? Do I just go over there and be like, ‘Hey I’m red for you, how are you?’”

“Well you gotta do something.”

“You’re right.” Karkat takes one step closer to the restaurant before he sees something that stops him.

A man in his mid-twenties walks up to Jade and kisses her on the mouth. He then takes his seat opposite to her and talks. Jade’s responsive to him and looks pleased. Karkat stands there shocked by this development.

“What’s wrong bro,” Gamzee asks still on the phone.

“She’s with another man.” Even saying those words hurt him.

“Are you sure? Maybe they’re just friends.”

“Yeah. I’m sure. It’s my own fault, if I should have listen to her more than I would have known she had a boyfriend or whatever he is. I took too long,” he claims defeated.

“Don’t let that stop you bro!” Gamzee says frantic. “Go up there and make her yours. Show her who has the bigger bulge!”

“Even with your stupid idea, I can’t tell her how I feel now. She’s happy with a guy that’s probably better for her than me. I can’t take that away from her. I don’t think I could take her away from him. He looks like he deserves her and he’ll treat her like she should be treated.” Karkat takes a deep breath, “I’m going home and am going to pretend none of this happened.”

“Karkat-“ The officer hangs up before another word could be said and wanders home empty.


End file.
